Oh my goodness. Oh my goodness. OH MY GOODNESS!!!!! (insert the dancing lady in the red dress emoji)
I have to be honest. I'm still squealing over here in Mississippi. There was no way to prepare myself for these scan results, and I will NEVER forget Tuesday, December 9 as long as God gives me air to breath!
That morning, the radiologist called us in (Vic's parents were with us) maybe 10 minutes after my scans. The first thing he said was, "Well. I have good news. I don't even know what to say, so I'll just show you," and he pulled up the images for us to see as we sat down in front of his computer. The difference was incredible. I couldn't even see the two smaller spots, and the largest spot looked like a speck on the screen. My inlaws were jumping and celebrating behind us, and I just sat there speechless with my jaw on the floor. The radiologist incredulously demanded to know what medicine they were giving me and said, "Do you even know how lucky you are?" After about 5 minutes of just staring at everyone in the room with my mouth agape, there were fist bumps, high fives and lots of hugging, screaming and fist pumping. Needless to say, we threw a big party that night, and we are still celebrating and thanking God.
We received the actual written report from the doctor the day after, and the results are nothing short of miraculous. I had 3 measurable tumors in my lungs: a 10 mm tumor, a 6.4 mm tumor and a 4.2 mm tumor. After 1 cycle of treatment over 8 weeks, the 10 mm tumor is now 3 mm; the 6.4 mm tumor is GONE; and the 4.2 mm tumor is almost 2 mm now (we initially thought this one was completely gone too).
The fact that, in the words of the radiologist, the tumors appear to be "melting away" is unheard of. A metastatic melanoma diagnosis doesn't give you the "luxury" of hoping for remission. It gives you a death sentence. That sounds awful and harsh, but, barring a miracle, that is reality. So you can imagine our great rejoicing over this VERY promising news!! I am overwhelmed at the goodness of our God.
I leave for treatment this weekend and start cycle 2 on Monday. I have approximately 8 million questions for my oncologist regarding what my scan results mean for me long term. What happens if after another cycle or 2 of treatment my tumors disappear completely? Will I keep taking treatments? Will I be considered in remission? Could these results be durable? As in, forever??
I hope to have an answer to these questions so that I can give a more formal update when I return from Boston next week. Regardless, we are so thrilled and SO THANKFUL for this renewed hope. We are so grateful that Jesus led us to EXACTLY the treatment I needed, and then proceeded to open up a spot for me in a trial that was already full. He has shown us incredible mercy and grace throughout this journey. Let me say it again, as loudly as possible, thank you Lord!
I love you all so much and SO APPRECIATE you walking through this with me. You will never, ever know how grateful I am to you all. One day, when this is all over, we are having a HUGE party. You are all invited. I insist! (Just don't mention it to Vic until alllll the tumors are gone.)
Now to him who is able to do immeasurably more than all we ask or imagine, according to his power that is at work within us, to him be glory in the church and in Christ Jesus throughout all generations, for ever and ever! Amen. -Eph 3:20-21